MLB The Show – World War K: All Stars and aWARs

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Start from the Beginning – Episode 1: The History of the First Base War

Previous Episode: Halfway There

A Post on the Future of World War K (and my possible psychic powers)

There was once a time, before MLB.tv and interleague play, when the All-Star Game really meant something.  Most fans didn’t have a chance to see players in the other league unless their team made the World Series.  Seeing the most popular players in the other league, even for a single exhibition game, was a fun novelty in the middle of a much-needed break in the regular season.  But as teams in both league became more accessible to fans across the country, interest in the All Star Game waned and MLB went to great lengths to revitalize it.

First, MLB implemented “This Time It Counts”, awarding home field advantage to the winning league in the WS.  When that failed to bring in the ratings MLB desired, in 2024, the stakes were raised with “No, Really, This Time It Definitely Counts” in which the teams in the winning league were awarded an extra roster spot for the remainder of the season.  People thought that was rightfully stupid, so MLB petitioned the U.S. Congress to pass the “It Counts More Than Ever Act of 2037”, in which Federal highway funds were awarded to cities in the league winning the All-Star Game.  When even that wasn’t enough to get people interested in 2045, the United Nations issued its controversial UN Declaration of Making It Count, which denied human rights protections from fans of teams in the losing league.

Back in alt-2014, most of this was in the future.  The All Star Game was a glamorous spectacle about honoring fan favorites and stupidly determining home field advantage.  And the two starting pitchers for the American League and National League were no surprise.

Allstar showdown

Indeed, the ASG would be a rematch between the deranged mind of Mike Mussina inside of a robot body and the time traveling pitching machine chosen by Mike Trout to save baseball. But they weren’t the only machines chosen to represent their respective leagues in the exhibition game.  In fact, all three position player Robot Masters were in the lineup, with Dixie Dirtbag holding down shortstop in the NL, Preacher Cobra at C and Flash Money at RF in the AL.

Allstar Lineup

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MLB Expands “This Time It Counts” To Decide Future Of Egypt

In an effort to boost flagging interest in the All Star Game, Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig has committed to using the midsummer classic to decide the fate of the Egyptian government.

“It’s the natural evolution of what we began ten years ago,” Selig said at the announcement. “Using the game to establish home field advantage in the World Series was enough to keep the public’s interest for a time, but after long discussions with the players union, I decided that the stakes had to be higher: the fate of a populous and historically significant sovereign nation.”

According to the amendment to the CBA, passed in the dead of the night at an emergency meeting on July 14, the outcome of tonight’s game will determine whether Egypt’s interim president, Hazem el-Beblawi, will remain at the head of the government or whether the ousted regime of Mohammed Morsi will be restored on the morning of the 17th.

Because the game will be hosted at Citi Field, a National League park, the NL was allowed to choose which side of the brutal conflict they would represent.

“It was a tough decision,” explained Yadier Molina, the leading vote-getter in the National League fan vote. “But we decided to go with el-Beblawi. It says something that, even after a revolution, a long time politician within the system was able to regain some control of the country. I think this speaks to both his vision for reform, and for stability.”

Tigers first baseman Miguel Cabrera, who will represent the American League, was pleased with how the decision shook out.  “I realize he abused his power, but Mohammed Morsi was the first democratically elected leader of the country. If we’re going to foster the spread of democracy across the middle east, we have to make the good with the bad, don’t we?”

The mechanics of how Major League Baseball intends to enforce the result of tonight’s game on the Egyptian government and people is still unclear. Some believe that Egypt will simply accept the results, as the outcome of the All Star Game is approximately as legitimate as any election that could take place in the near future. Others suggest that an elite squad of commandos led by St. Louis Cardinals pitcher Chris Carpenter will be involved.