NBA 2K14 – Quantum Hoop Episode 16: The Big Dogs

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Hey, Beckett, I see you’re flush with VC now. How about you buy this sleeve?
Why would I want a sleeve?
It makes your shooting better.
That’s just silly.
Something about a failed energy drink that could float.
WHAT?
Yeah we fucked up on that investment and now several square miles in New Jersey are uninhabitable.
FUCK. What else could go wrong?
We’re trading for another SG.
…why?
YEAH WHY?
Don’t worry he won’t be stealing your minutes.
Hehehehehe

NBAgif

Yo, dawg, thanks for backing me up on this Tony Allen thing.
I think we both know your minutes are safe, so I appreciate it.
No problem. We’ve had our fights in the past…
I made you wear a clown nose.
But I think we came out better for it.
Whatever happened to that clown nose? Haven’t seen it in a while.
Yeah that kind of got dropped out of nowhere. There wasn’t even a cutscene explaining it.
Cutscene?
I… Uh… I…
I’ve been saying weird stuff like this ever since I saw the cover of that video game I’m on.
NBA 2k15 or something like that?
You’re not making any sense.
Yeah, I’ve been hearing that a lot.
So, how are we going to keep Tony Allen off our backs?
I don’t know. I want to believe the GM that he really isn’t a threat but…
Something doesn’t seem right.
I would watch out for Allen if I were you. He was involved in this shooting incident once and–
Wait, Tony Allen shot someone?
No, that’s the scary thing… He was just around. He broke someone’s eye socket.
With his fist? During a shooting?
I told you, Beckett. Watch out.
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NBA 2K14 – Quantum Hoop Episode 4: In Which Sam Beckett Becomes a N00b Feeder

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Alright I’m on the way to my next game.
Not so fast, we need to download a patch.
FUCK.

Inthecar

Alright, Al, are we ready to go now?
Among other things we addressed a discrepancy between dynamic goals and social media messages.
I don’t know what that means.
Maybe you should check out your stats before you head to the game.

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NBA 2K14 – Quantum Hoop Episode 1: The Far Flung Future

Huh, basketball again? At least it’s a sport I know I can handle.
Still, something doesn’t seem right. If I’m playing basketball, why am I wearing long pants?
And why are there ads for Sprite everywhere I look?
Man, I’ve been looking all over for you. Should have known you’d be here.
Just working on my moves. Say, when did all these Sprite ads appear?
Sprite ads? That’s what you’re worried about?
I was worried about what year I’d leapt into. This didn’t feel like any time I’d been to before.
Just wondering, that’s all.
You don’t even want to know why I’m so excited?
Take a look at this: an invite to the Rookie Showcase in New York.
This is your ticket to the first round of the draft.
This is amazing!
An easily identified obstacle and goal…and I’ve only been here five minutes!
Man, what the hell are you talking about? Are you high? Or are you just dehydrated?
Sounds like you need a nice, refreshing can of Sprite.
The mystery just deepened.
Look, I don’t care what you have to do. Snap out of it. We’ve got work to do.
Don’t worry about me. Just let me see that invite and…
Wait, does this say it’s 2013???

ohboytest

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