Yo Beckett I have these endorsements but you gotta make a choice.
Tastes great or less filling?
You know, from the Miller Lite commercials.
No, I don’t.
Oh, I guess you’re too young for that.
We’re the same age.
Yeah. Yeah, that’s right…
Sprite or Sprint? Nike or Jordan?
Isn’t Jordan just a Nike imprint?
Shut up and choose!
Uh… Nike and Sprite.
We’re getting close, Sam. One more win and the 76ers clinch a playoff spot.
I don’t care about that. March 29 is what matters, right?
Maybe. I’ve had Ziggy 2.0 looking into this, and it isn’t quite so simple.
What do you mean?
March 29, 2014 is a special date for the history of the 76ers in all timelines.
What do you mean?
In the original timeline, the 76ers narrowly avoided setting a record on March 29…
…the record for most consecutive losses for an NBA team.
Oh, wow, that’s pretty terrible.
They didn’t have anyone who could score like you. Thaddeus Young had the best PPG.
That’s pretty bad.
It was a disgraceful season. But by leaping into your son, and setting him right before the draft…
…you made sure that the 76ers had a frontline shooter and everything fell into place.
That was all it took?
Somehow it also prevented Nerlens Noel from getting injured…
…and netted the 76ers a phantom draft pick to select Michael Carter-Williams.
Fair enough. But you said that March 29 was important across all timelines.
This is going to take some explanation.
Right now… It isn’t your first time leaping into this timeline.
Hey, Beckett, I see you’re flush with VC now. How about you buy this sleeve?
Why would I want a sleeve?
It makes your shooting better.
That’s just silly.
Something about a failed energy drink that could float.
Yeah we fucked up on that investment and now several square miles in New Jersey are uninhabitable.
FUCK. What else could go wrong?
We’re trading for another SG.
Don’t worry he won’t be stealing your minutes.
Yo, dawg, thanks for backing me up on this Tony Allen thing.
I think we both know your minutes are safe, so I appreciate it.
No problem. We’ve had our fights in the past…
I made you wear a clown nose.
But I think we came out better for it.
Whatever happened to that clown nose? Haven’t seen it in a while.
Yeah that kind of got dropped out of nowhere. There wasn’t even a cutscene explaining it.
I… Uh… I…
I’ve been saying weird stuff like this ever since I saw the cover of that video game I’m on.
NBA 2k15 or something like that?
You’re not making any sense.
Yeah, I’ve been hearing that a lot.
So, how are we going to keep Tony Allen off our backs?
I don’t know. I want to believe the GM that he really isn’t a threat but…
Something doesn’t seem right.
I would watch out for Allen if I were you. He was involved in this shooting incident once and–
Wait, Tony Allen shot someone?
No, that’s the scary thing… He was just around. He broke someone’s eye socket.
With his fist? During a shooting?
I told you, Beckett. Watch out.
Yo, Ellis, what’s up?
Ready for another social media wager?
No, that’s silly.
Something’s wrong with you, you’re playing even worse than usual.
That’s because I’m testing you.
Yeah, this is all messed up.
Man, quit worrying. Look at all these endorsements.
NBA 2K15? This makes me profoundly uncomfortable.
What do you mean?
Are you serious?
Just don’t think about it.
Okay, so what’s the next cliffhanger?
Seriously? The cliffhanger is what the next cliffhanger will be?
That doesn’t even make sense.
I don’t make sense?
You’re the one talking about cliffhangers and video games and shit.
Yeah, maybe I need to forget about that and focus on the game.
That’s a good idea. I know you’re on top of the world now…
…but you can’t let up.
I know, I know, March 29.
March 29? What happens then?
Oh, damn, you’re not Al…
Who the hell is Al?
Is he another super agent?
Are you going to betray me again?
I really can’t explain.