NBA 2K14 – Quantum Hoop Episode 13: Make Rivals Not Rivals.com Puns

prevon

C’mon, Sam, join my agency. Don’t you want to be famous?
Don’t you want to make more VC?
More sweet, sweet VC…
Are you drooling?
Don’t listen to that guy. He’s going to take a huge cut of your money.
Also I’m your best friend.
I don’t respond to guilt, man.
Really? You should. It would make this decision a lot easier.
Also, I maybe got you a Kia commercial. Kia!
The super agent or my best friend? What do I do?
I don’t know, Sam, but right now you should get ready for another game against Detroit and Jackson Ellis.
Them? Again?

Justdetroit

Okay, Ellis, let’s go over this one more time.
You are going to kill Sam Beckett Jr.
In the tunnel, or in the locker room, or on the court…
…and when I say “on the court” I mean you will literally kill him…
…not just try to outplay him in basketball.
Yo, I heard you last time.
The first time I misunderstood, but you were loud and clear before game 2.
And?
I decided not to commit murder, especially when I still don’t get why you want him dead.
Don’t make this harder than it has to be, Jackson.
More importantly, I’m the reason you made it to the NBA, remember?
You keep saying that, but I don’t know if it’s true.
In the original timeline, where I don’t interfere, you’re nobody.
I’m not even drafted?
You don’t even exist.
How does that work?
I’d have to teach you string theory for you to understand.
Oh, is that how you make string cheese?
I definitely want to learn that. How do you get the cheese to pull apart in those strips?
Well, you see, the proteins are aligned so that–
Wait a minute, that’s not what string theory is about at all!
Aw… Damn.
This is all just a distraction. Are you going to do as I ask or not?
I can’t kill him, Dr. Beckett. Even if he is actually you, and you must have a good reason.
He’s my rival. We drive each other to be better. If he’s dead…
Maybe I might as well be out of the game, too.
Oh shut up with that self righteous bullshit.
You’re asking me to murder another human being.
For the greater good.
Explain how killing your son–inhabited by yourself from the past–is the greater good…
And maybe I’ll do it.
I can’t.
Then we’re done here.
You’ll regret this, Ellis. Come March 29, you won’t have this choice.

justnextday

Yo, Jackson, how are things going.
Listen, Beckett, I need to talk to you.
Oh, you gonna go on about how you’re gonna dunk on me?
How you’re gonna take home the “W”? Well..

TheOnlyW

No man, this is serious. This is some real shit going down.
This is about March 29.
Wait, you’re really going to tell me what you know?
I don’t know anything about he real plot, but I know who’s behind it all.
Who? Who is behind it all?
He asked me to kill you, but I couldn’t do it.
You’re my rival, Beckett, not my enemy.
That’s some deep shit and I appreciate it but please get to the point.
Who wants to kill me? Who is behind March 29?
If I tell you directly, he’ll find out. But let’s have a little competition…

AnotherWager

What? That’s our usual bet.
What does that have to do with anything?
Chill, man, it’s code.
Like in Harry Potter when Harry sends a message to Snape about Sirius…
…by using his childhood nickname “Padfoot”.
That was all just gibberish to me, Ellis.
Man, I’m not the weird one here!
You should understand these references.
Shoot straight with me. What’s going on?
I just told you: I can’t.
But if you outscore me, check social media after the game.
Dude, I’m going to outscore you. Have you looked at the leaderboards?
That’s what I’m saying, Beckett.
After the game, check social media.

beckettscore
ellisscore

Yeah, there really wasn’t much question about that.
Sam, I think he was trying to send you a coded message.
Ellis knew you’d outscore him, and like usual he’d have to embarass himself on “social media”.
Oh, that’s what was going on…
I think you’ve been in Junior’s mind too long if you missed that.
Let’s see what he has to say.

SocialMedia

I don’t see a code, Al.
Then you’re not looking hard enough.
You sure about that? You sure Ellis isn’t just fucking with me?
Why would he make the wager with you again if there wasn’t another meaning behind it?
He was right. He knew you would outscore him. You’re outscoring everyone.
So he had to have another reason to make the wager?
He wanted a way to pass a secret message to you.
Just like when Harry Potter alerted Snape about Sirius Black by–
Oh c’mon, not you too?
Ziggy 2.0 has passed along this fascinating book series from your time.
I don’t want to hear it. Let’s just get along with the codebreaking.
Look, why did he start this tweet with “Truth”. What do you think that means?
That what follows is the truth? I am the best scorerer in the league after all.
No, that’s part of the message. Look at this.

socialmedia2

Pick out these letters and what does it say?
Wait, how did you know to pick out these specific letters?
It’s the code.
But these letters–
It’s advanced mathematics. Ziggy 2.0 is handling it. Just look at what it says.
Its U Sam Fo Sho?
Wait…
That’s right.
Is this saying what I think it’s saying?
It’s u fo sho.
Me?
I think Jackson Ellis is trying to tell you that you are the one behind March 29.
That’s impossible.
No, it isn’t. Think about it, Sam. If you eventually leap back into your real body…
…you would be around today, in this time, in your own body.
And I end up creating Jackson Ellis and whatever is going to happen on March 29.
If LeBron James is to be believed, you also killed Donna.
None of this makes any sense.
But the message is clear.
It really isn’t. It looks like you arbitrarily chose those letters.
Trust me, Sam. This is advanced codebreaking.
If you say so…
You just have to prepare for the possibility that the future “you” is behind the Pistons.
My head hurts.
In the meanwhile, it’s time to meet with the agent who has been courting you.
What are you going to do? Give up on a lifetime of VC or a lifelong friend?

BackOfLimo

So, kid, how’s everything been?
Well, I think I may have killed my wife and may be trying to kill myself.
Woah.
I never signed up for that.
It’s a long story.
Good, because I don’t have a lot of time and I really don’t want to know what you’re talking about.
You want a decision, don’t you?
I’ve been very patient…

yesorno

I think that’s fair.
I heard that your “agent” has a deal lined up with Kia.
Kia? Really?
Kia is a legitimate car company.
Not really.
They’re South Korea’s second largest car manufacturer.
Are you even listening to yourself?
Yeah, you’re right, that was a pretty ridiculous way to phrase things.
But Kia does make cars.
Sure. “Cars”.
What’s your decision?

cantleavemyfriend

I can’t do it. I can’t betray my friend.
Really? That’s what you care about? Not fame? Not VC?
I care about getting home.
You’re insane. Certifiable.

shortroadtobottom

Man, I’m leading the league in scoring.
It is not a short road to the bottom.
We’ll see about that.
I’m going to smear you all over the media.
People are going to be “Sam Beckett Junior? More like Sam Suck-It Junior”.
I don’t think that people will be calling me that.
Come to camp a little bigger? You’ll be “Ham Beckett” for the rest of the season.
You’re going to get revenge on me with puns?
You bet, Wreck-it. Lamb Wreck-it.
I think I’m going to go home now.
Oh, and Dr. Beckett will hear about this.
Wait…
What did you just say?
Oh, uh, well it was nothing.
Who hired you? Who told you to engage me as a potential client?
Was it me? I mean… Was it my father?
I’ve said too much.
This meeting is over.

DecidedAgainstDroppingAgent

Hey, thanks for coming by.
Yeah, well you’re my friend.
I’ve got something important I gotta tell you…
and I wanted to tell you this in person.
Man, this is just cruel.
Why you gotta do this?
Well…

keepagent

What? Seriously?
Man, we’ve been together too long to just drop you.
You serious?
You’re picking me over the superagent?
That’s right.
Listen, we got a deal coming up with–
Don’t worry about it. Let’s just relax…

playsome2k

Yeah, sounds good.
And lets take a look at the standings and stats going into the next few games.

standings

stats

Wow, the 76ers are in the lead.
Did you ever have any doubt?
Yeah, actually, you should know what happened when I wasn’t around.
When you weren’t around.
Never mind. Don’t worry about it.
Well the All Star game is coming up, and I think you’ll have good news.
Take a look at this billboard.

ThisCityMadeMe

What does this mean?
C’mon, Beckett, it’s a new endorsement. It means you’re an All Star.
Wow, I’m really changing the timeline, aren’t I?
The timeline?

TBC

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