I want you to destroy Sam Beckett Jr.
Don’t worry, I’m going to run him all around the court.
No, I want you to kill him.
Yeah, I’m going to kill his unsustainable shooting percentage.
Listen, you need to murder him.
Exactly, murder his all star game chances.
Argh
Your first game against Jackson Ellis is coming up. How are you going to prepare?
Getting into a fight with Jason Richardson, of course.
That’s not productive…
You’re going down, Beckett.
We’ll see.
Fuck, embarassed myself again!
You disappoint me, Ellis.
I don’t even know who you are.
I’m Dr. Sam Beckett
That doesn’t make any sense!
Or maybe it makes too much sense.
No. No it doesn’t!

Well, Al, I soundly beat Jason Ellis in Detroit and the 76ers are actually playing like a good team.
This is going more smoothly than expected.
I wouldn’t get too used to it.
Why not?
I suspect that there is more than meets the eye about this situation.
Why is that?
If it’s really going to be this easy, then the run up to March 29 is going to be a slog.
I said “smoothly” not “easy”.
I still have to wear that stupid clown nose in public.
We should get some pictures of that to send back to everyone at the office.
Did you know they don’t use film to take pictures anymore?
What? Polaroid finally won?
It’s all digital.
Digital? Like 1s and 0s?
I guess so.
How does that even work?
I don’t know, but my phone can take unlimited pictures.
What’s the use of putting a camera on a phone? How many pictures can you take of your own living room?
Get this… I’m talking about a mobile phone.
You’re messing with me.
It’s smaller than my wallet.
And it’s made by Apple.
Now I know you’re just making this up.
My ex-wife invested in Apple. Terrible decision.
I hope she didn’t sell.
Or maybe I do, depending on how spiteful you are.

That game yesterday sucked, dawg. I guess our streak wasn’t gonna last forever.
Yeah, losing to the Bobcats like that was disappointing.
They’re the easiest team we’ll see for a while. All good or average teams coming up.
Nuggets, Clippers, T-Wolves, Raptors, then Trailblazers.
I kept meaning to ask, what’s the deal with “raptors”?
A raptor is a bird, but their logo is some kind of lizard.
Are you fucking with us, Beckett?
…no?
Are you guys messing with me?
It’s supposed to be a velociraptor, dawg.
But that’s an awkward name for a team.
Wait, like the dinosaur?
That’s a deep cut for dinosaurs.
I think they’d go for t-rex, or triceratops.
Pterodactyls might work best for a basketball team.
I might go allosaurus or even brontosaurus before velociraptor.
First of all, brontosaurus ain’t even real.
Your dinosaur game is weak.
Second of all, how the hell don’t you know about raptors?
When I was a kid I wanted to be a raptor.
The dinosaur, not the basketball team.
When did velociraptors get popular?
You seriously never saw Jur–
Hold up, Jason, I’ve got this one.
You see, Beckett, it makes sense why you wouldn’t get it.
It does?
Yeah. You see, velociraptors are only cool in the black community.
Really?
It’s sort of a hip-hop thing, and one that fortunately hasn’t been co-opted by the mainstream.
You can’t spell “velociraptor” without “rap”, after all.
Wow. I had no idea.
Tupac started it with his rhymes back in ’95. Goes something like this:
Imagine yo’self in the Cretaceous world.
You enter a clearing and he moves like a bird.
You stare at him and he stares right back.
Bobbing his head and then the attack.
Not from the front but from the side.
‘Cause the trick is that raptors can hide.
They slash at you with retractable claws.
Across yo’ belly like rusty saws.
There go the intestines with a mighty whirl.
And all you can say is “clever girl.”
Wow, hip-hop got weird while I wasn’t paying attention.
Yeah, real experimental and high concept.
Beckett! Enough chatting with the team! I need to talk to you!
Coming, coach!
Hmmm… That was strange.
If Thaddeus is willing to lie about Jurassic Park, what else is he making up?

Oh god that death stare.
What did you say about me?
Uh, well, nothing. What did you want to talk about?
Is this about velociraptors? Because I still have questions.
We need to talk about how you played.
I had 37 points.

Maybe you haven’t heard, but there’s no “I” in team.
We lost the game.
C’mon, coach, look at those stats. I had over a third of the team’s points.
What did I just say?
Listen, Beckett, I put you out there because I had faith in you.
And you disappointed me.
37 points!
If you’d scored 45, we would have won the game.
Are you joking?

This is a joke, right? What do I have to do?
I know that it’s tough with your disease and all.
But I can’t make playing time decisions based on my heart.
You don’t have to! I scored–
As far as I’m concerned, your reaction is just proving that I made the right call.
And if I just let you bench me?
I’m not benching you, kid. I’m sending a message.
And what is that message?
That scoring the most points on the team…
…and changing the course of history to make this team above .500…
…isn’t good work?
Changing the course of history?
You’re really full of yourself, aren’t you kid?
It’s not like that. It’s hard to explain.
Yeah, sure, whatever. I’m tired of hearing of it.
Get ready for the next game, maybe try a little harder this time.

God damn it, not this again.
Calm down, Sam. This is just a minor setback.
It’s like I said, there needs to be conflict. Otherwise the next few months will be boring.
But this is so stupid!
I’m not disappointing this team! Coach is insane!
This, coming from a man yelling at himself in the tunnel.
Fair point.
You had this coming. You should have never let the story about the disease stick.
That has nothing to do with my lost playing time.
It’s karma, Sam.
You know I don’t believe in karma.
Sam, you are jumping through time now into the body of your own son.
How is there anything that you don’t believe in?
That’s science, Al.
I’ve been on this project for years and I’m not so sure it really is science.
Trust me, I ran the equations myself.
Man, who are you talking to?
Hey! It’s…
You! My agent!
You still don’t know his name, do you?
Yeah, just checking on things. Seems to be going great.
You weren’t in there with coach a few minutes ago.
Looks like my playing time is getting cut again.
Well, then I’ve come at a good time. There’s something we need to talk about.
What? I’ve got a game coming up.
You know if you’re not happy you can find a way out.
Ask for a trade, or if your team chemistry is low enough, they’ll force one.
Wait, I could just get off this team?
Yeah! It’s not like you’re stuck here.
And it sounds like the coach hasn’t been so great for you.
Well… I can’t.
What? Why?
March 29
What happens then?
It is a really long story.
I wish I could just leave, but it’s impossible.
Hey man, calm down. There are worse places you could be.
You could have been drafted by the Utah Jazz.
Imagine that. You could have to live in Utah.
What’s wrong with Utah?
Man, you are the whitest motherfucker.
Hey, I gotta get to the game. But we can talk about Utah later.
Sure, whatever…
Psst… Hey, you.
Jason Richardson? Oh, wow, you were one of my heros growing up.
God damn it I’m only 33
Could you sign this for me? My name is–
I don’t care what your name is. I want to talk about Sam Beckett.
Oh… Okay.

So, coach, just gonna keep me on the bench?
Just like I said earlier today.
Man…
C’mon, give me a chance.
Let me out there.
You’re agitated, Beckett.
Damn right I am!
All right, go out there. Show me what you’ve got.
That’s more like it! That’s–

Oh man, I can’t let this go.
I’ll show them.

On your first play? You got thrown out on your first play?
Coach, did you see that foul on Thaddeus?
I couldn’t let that stand.
Well you’re out of the game. Barely even a few seconds in.
It was worth it.

So, you’re still wearing that nose?
Even after everything that happened?
Hey, when you decide on a style you commit to it.
You got ejected tonight, after standing up for your teammate..
…how do you feel about that?

It wasn’t cool what they did to Thaddeus.
He’s a good teammate. He taught me about velociraptors and modern hip hop.
I had to stand up for him.
And what does your team think about your vigilantism?
Well, that remains to be seen…

What was that, Beckett?
If I’m going to be part of this team, I’m going to go all out.
I know you want to endear yourself to Thaddeus and Richardson and the others.
Honestly I don’t really care for Richardson.
But this isn’t the way.

I understand. It won’t happen again.
You sure?
Honestly, I don’t know how this all works.
It might happen again if it’s part of the storyline.
Storyline?
I can’t help but feel that this is all part of some story.
Why else is coach benching me after 37 points?
Why did that foul happen right after I came in?
It’s all weird.
Did you hit your head in that game?
I’m serious, it’s strange!

You’re going to be suspended for a game.
Haven’t been getting much playing time anyway.
I’ll talk to coach about that.
Until then, try to keep your temper to yourself.

Gather around, boys. We have some tough games coming up.
But fortunately, we’ve been doing okay.
Yeah, gave me more playing time in the last game now that I’m back from suspension.
And we won, didn’t we?
Let’s take a look at the standings and our stats.

I’d tell you to keep it up, but I think we can do better.
And after a talk with the GM, I think Sam Beckett Jr. will be part of that.
Hold up, coach.
There’s something you should know.
No, there’s something everyone should know.
And what is that?
I did some digging around.
And, guess what?
Beckett is a fraud.
Multiple Dystrophy isn’t even real.
Oh boy…